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Monster Ferrero Rocher

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So, Easter. Love it or hate it, it’s undeniable that (even for chocolate addicts) it is a time of feeling, well, sick. Visiting my rather fat Northern grandparents, I received a rather tasty box of Ferrero Rocher. The next day, Monday, I get recommended to have a look at this site. Cool, I thought, desperately thinking of possible pimps. However, the real inspiration came on Tuesday morning, when I showed my good friend Tom (and neighbour- has its disadvantages, may I say) the site. The box of Ferrero Rocher lay innocently in front of us, and within a couple of minutes it was decided that we should make one giant FR (that’s text talk for ya). At around 11am, we set off for my friend Dans house. The reason for this being so we didn’t make a damn good mess of our own kitchens…

After bumming around for a while, we set off for Rusts, a lovely little supermarket where 75% of the items are tinned for OAPs. We didn’t really think it through, so brought what we thought we needed, however thanks to my incredible guesswork, we only had a little left over.

As you can see, the ingredients do look fantastic. A lack of hazelnuts and wafery-type-crunchy things were not going to put us off though. We improvised with chocolate wafers and Brazil nuts (later were crushed to be more Ferrero Rocher-esque).

We started by melting one bar of chocolate in the microwave for 3 minutes:

Crushed Brazil nuts were added to this chocolatey goo, as you can see. However, this is when our problems started. Our plan was to line 2 bowls with nutty chocolate goo, line this goo with wafers, add nuts and Nutella goo in the middle, then join them together. We put it in the fridge to make it more solid, then realised we wouldn’t be able to remove the finished product. It was quickly removed and greaseproof paper was added, as we can see here:

About 2 seconds afterwards, we realised it wouldn’t shape properly, so was transferred to a cling film lined bowl. You can see the sides are roughly spread with goo:

It was put in the fridge for 15 minutes so we could eat pizza (which was tasty). It came out when we had finished and looked pretty solid. We then lined it with yummy orange wafer things:

This was when everything got uncontrollably messy. One and a half tubs of Nutella were added, damn that stuff is sticky. Looked fantastic though, it cannot be ignored.

Time to make the other half, here it is being prepared before being fridgified. This time was smooth, we were doing it amazingly, but disaster struck later on. Of course, you must read on to see those incredible chronicles!

Whilst that was solidifying, we checked on the first half. Randomly added nuts and left over wafers. By that time, that half looked a little something like this:

Feeling generally happy, that was replaced in the fridge for later on. The second half which was now fairly solid (or so we thought) was removed. Maybe we were too ambitious and slightly foolish, but shock ensued when the cling film was *apparently* stuck solid, and we could not remove it. However, turning it upside down was the worst decision ever, I now realise. With a little tap on the ass, the whole bleedin’ lot fell flat on its face. Here are the remnants being scraped back into the now buggered second half:

Ironically, this was also a good move, as the cling film had unstuck and it was removed. That rather mashed up half was stuck together to the perfect first half, using left over melted chocolate as glue…

Yes, we know its different colours. Regrettably, we brought 2 bars milk and 1 bar plain chocolate. A rookie mistake, it must be said. Also, yes, it doesn’t look like a Ferrero Rocher, but being the perfectionists that we are, we rummaged around and found a couple of bars of Dairy Milk. They were melted, crushed almonds (weird taste, seriously) were added, now this sticky mess was spread as well as possible around the outside, for effect, ya see. This is our rather perfect finished product, with standard FR for comparison:

A good day for all, it is proving a little difficult to eat though… not suprising really, now weighing in at 1452 grams- a little larger than the standard 12 gram midget!

Happy pimpin’ y’all.

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