Creme Egg Disaster
by for £8.10

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While writing up this project I've recruited the smooth tunes of The Ending Of to help get me through this harrowing tale of ambition, disaster, and partial recovery.

I decided, for a bit of fun, to recreate the original Giant Creme Egg pimp but also melt down the discarded creme egg chocolate shells and use them to create a second solid chocolate egg. The end result was not what was expected. Here are the ingredients anyway:

30 Creme Eggs
2 x Regular sized Creme Egg easter eggs

The business of trying to extract the fondant from 30 eggs is not even funny. It takes absolutely ages and is unbelievably sticky, added to the fact that creme eggs weren't designed to be split neaty in half and more often than not imploded when poked with a knife.

Blood, spit, an hour later, and we're getting somewhere.

Looks good right? For those that would complain that the white and yellow insides have been mixed up, I really must advise you to try it yourself , because getting the stuff out to start with is such a pain you don't even think about trying to seperate the white and yellow. I wished more than once I had access to a creme egg factory for 5 minutes.

Anyway, I melt the outsides of the egg gently to allow me to stick the two halves of this worthy egg together, and then this happens.

Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

Many, many profanities were uttered when it turned out the larger creme egg shell was unable to actually support the weight of all that fondant for more than 10 seconds before collapsing inwards. I've just spent an hour messing about with this sticky gunk and I'm extremely unhappy.

The melting of the chocolate shells wasn't going well either.

I don't care what you say, Cadburys chocolate really can't be melted well regardless of the method used. Despite being carefully suspended in a bowl of boiling water this just mushed up into a crap goo not even vaguely approaching melted chocolate.

So, I'm not terribly happy, as both pimps have just completed failed and I've wasted an hour. But, the pimpdaddy doesn't give up, and strikes upon a new idea.

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