Colossal Vanilla Slice
by for £34.00

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Estimated Cost: AUD$70.00 for the ingredients
AUD$15.00 for the mould

We here in Australia are a humble bunch, but we love nothing more than to beat the Poms at their own game. Yes, yes I realise we lost the last Rugby World Cup, and the Ashes for that matter, so it was time for us Aussies to regain some lost pride. It was time for me and my mate Pimp-master Mark to restore the honour.

It took us a bit of time to come up with something uniquely Australian, and in the end we decided on the humble Vanilla Slice, which is choice custard, sandwiched between puff pastry and topped with icing.

To get this pimp underway we needed the following ingredients:

18 Litres of milk
1.5kg or raw sugar
1kg of custard powder
6 sheets of lovely puff pastry
Bit of gelatine
Vanilla essence
1kg of icing sugar
Raspberry jam
And some butter

Also, we found that there were no baking trays suitable for scale of behemoth-ness we were looking for, so I went to the local hardware store and purchased some MDF to make the mould. This is me using my long lost 8th grade woodworking skills. It would make any form worker proud I am sure.

First of all we lined the mould with some glad wrap to make removal easier. Then we joined a few pieces of puff pastry together to make the base of the slice. Note to puff pastry suppliers – your pathetic sheets are far too small for serious pimping!!

Now came the serious part – the custard. We were unsure if it would be stable enough, so we added some gelatine. Pimp-master Mark made a test batch to check consistency and stability. It looked solid enough, and when eaten, it had the consistency of Clag glue, so we knew we had it right.

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