by MC Sheena, Puff Andy and Susan-em for £6.66
28th April 2006
Pages: 1 2
Yo homies, we had been planning an after-eight extravaganza for weeks but were usurped by a cheeky pimp-team with their £8 peppermint essence shenanigans. With a bag full of cheap chocolate and even cheaper pimper-mint about to go to waste, we thought we had had it, fo shizzle. However, we did have one last-gasp pimp-genius idea up our gold shellsuit sleeves. Yep, our Ultim-eight may appear like a mere copy to you eagle-eyed pimpers, but with the addition of a blingin’ 24-carat wrapper, we may have justified our repetition. And we made not one, but two. Stick that in your posh-pimpin-pipe and smoke it, yo.
10 bars of super cheap Sainsbury’s chocolate. There are only 7 in the picture, but like all good pimpers we had some extra in the cupboard to stretch our pimp to the power of 2. Cost = £2.50
2/3 of a box of Fondant icing sugar. With added glucose powder for pimpin’ gloopiness. Cost = about 33p
Peppermint essence – the real stuff, yet still only cost 89p. £8 indeed, pah!
Bling-film. Cost unknown
Shiny black card. Cost = 95p
Gold pen for the professional touch. 24 carat, honest. £1.99
Total cost = £6.66.
First things first, we melted down the chocolate. We tried the microwave method and nearly caused an explosion due to the inclusion of some solid silver blingin’ wrapping from the chocolate. We switched to the old-skool stove-top method over boiling water.
Meanwhile we lined the square dish with bling-film for that authentic rippled effect and easy removal. Next, the chocolate was poured in a thin layer in the dish. Then, into the freezer to chill. Ice-cold, dawg.
Next step the delicious peppermint cream filling. None of this corn syrup schmorn syrup nonsense – here we were strictly old-skool with just icing sugar and tip top tap water. The mint-level was tested several times to get that genuine all-authentic sweet toothpaste taste just right.
Over the chocolate it went, leaving a space around the outside to seal with more chocolate, then back into the freezer. We figured we had to give the filling a fighting chance for survival as we were going to pour more steaming hot chocolate on top.