Oversize Turkish Delight

Ingredients-
1 litre water
2K sugar
285 g cornflour
1 1/2 tbp rosewater
2 tsp lemon juice
1 tsp cream of tartar
Red Food colouring
350g milk chocolate

To be fair, a variety of supermarkets took part in the pimp. Lidl’s sugar was added to 285ml of the water along with the Tesco lemon juice. The temperature was raised to a scary 115 degrees and removed from the heat.

In the mean time, another whopping great pan was filled with the rest of the water, Sainsbury’s cornflour and cream of tartar. Vigorous whisking was applied on a frequent basis to ensure that the liquid turned into the desired ‘gooey paste’.

The hot syrup was then poured slowly into the paste and simmered gloopily for one hour, and it turned a gloriously pale gold in colour. However, 6 drops of red food colouring had to be added to achieve the requisite lurid pink. Rosewater was added for flavour. Yum.

The concoction was poured into a suitably proportioned roasting tin and refrigerated overnight.

Melted milk chocolate was poured in one layer, and stippled for that classic Fry’s underside effect.

Finally, the pimp was upended (with a bit of poking and thumpin) and smothered in a glorious milky chocolate jacket. 2350g of yum, or 51/4 lb, and a squillion or so calories