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Baby Bertie
by Big Wiganer for £2.50

3rd November 2006

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600g Box of Liquorice Allsorts: £2.50

Breathing life into the living embodiment of sweet-toothed-cheekiness: priceless

Opa!! This is me, chef, next to a box of treats that imprisons everybody's old favourite, just waiting to get out.

All we need is a little chef magic, and a bit of imagination. I just wave my conveniently positioned arm like so, and it begins…

Wait…I'm not doing this now…they're moving of their own accord! They're taking a kind of humanoid shape before my eyes…

I should have known, our character now coming to life is not based on accurately sized and scaled pieces like in his picture at all!…I shall have to add to the magical mix a little bit of wizardry with a novelty oversized knife – whilst still waving my arm of course – very important that…

It's coming together, I can't believe it, surely this freak of nature cannot truly live, never mind stand. Hmmm, maybe the hat's the key…

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