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The Devils Chocolate Orange
by G*Nome for £3.98

14th June 2006

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Step 1: The first natural step is to find the Devil and ask him how big he likes his chocolate oranges. Unfortunately I couldn't actually tie the evil one down to ask him so through a mutual friend I find out he eats his chocolate oranges 125 times as big. Fair enough I thought, I'll see what I can do

Step 2: Planning. I bought and took measurements for Terry's chocolate orange and proceeded to calculate how big the Devil wanted his. It turns out Lucifer wants a chocolate orange a whooping 32.5 cm in diameter. This is easily as big as a football.

Step 3: Not seeing suitable mould materials in Morrisons, I looked around my pimp house. I decided to use my pimping Lava Lamp Box as the mould using (unwisely) regular sellotape to put it together.

Step 4: I calculated how much chocolate this actually is, it turns out to be 21.875kg. Thinking back to Morrisons reasonable 25p for 100g , I quickly realised this would cost in excess of £50. Now I'm a good pimp, but not that good and knew I would never be able to afford that and so I decided to make a single slice, and then anymore on demand for my hoes and the Devil. Thankfully this will cost just £3 and equates to just over 1kg, pimptastic.

Step 5: Purchase the ingredients: chocolate and orange essence.

Step 6: Melt the chocolate like every good pimp by heating it over boiling water.

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