Pimp That Snack

Jafftastic Louis Vuitton Jaffa Cake

by Naomi Allsop 7 photos Rated 77% 263 votes when voting closed

First of all we’d like to introduce you to our ingredients and spacious pimping area. Our project, as you will already know, is the Triple decker Jafftastic Louis Vuitton Jaffa Cake™, brought to you by Asda smart price Hulme, Manchester, UK. An ambitious pimp you might think… but one we have planned to perfection.

Wine, flour, Stork, eggs, sugar, marmalade and chocolate cake covering, with two round sandwich tins in front

Stage 1: spunking sponge

First things first, we crack the wine. Not that we need the creative help – we’re just alcoholics. Next, we mix a basic sponge base. Come on now, we don’t need to explain this to you – it’s something all senior level snack pimpers should be able to do.

Flour tipped from a metal jug into a pan of creamed butter and eggs, stirred by hand

Stage 2: spreading the love.

When we have creamed the sponge mix to perfection, we spread it very carefully into the bottom of our top of the range baking trays. A meticulous operation. Into the oven quicker than you can say pass me a drink, pimp.

Three tins filled with pale sponge batter on a table beside a glass of red wine

Stage 3: rise to fame

Out of the oven and straight into the fridge for a well-earned break. Time to chill out.

Stage 4: vino pimpo

We take the opportunity for a glass of vino – and a quick episode of ‘The Office’. Pass the guitar. Genius.

Stage 5: stackin’

The sponges are cool so we get on with pimping the decks – expertly spreading each layer with Asda’s finest Seville orange marmalade. Meanwhile, Snoop Dogg is pimping in the background. It’s a “sign”. If only he were as pimped up as this snack!

Marmalade being spooned onto a baked sponge disc, the jar and a second sponge waiting behind

Stage 6: chavvin’ the chocolate

Next for the outer layer – the Jaffa’s puffa one might say. This gets quite messy at one point, but the result is nonetheless PERFECT. We think you’ll agree. Unfortunately, we do make a small ‘school boy’ error. We put the chocolate covered giant into the fridge and on removal, we discover it’s welded to the plate. After some serious chiselling, we finally free the Jaffa.

Melted chocolate poured over the stacked sponges, running around the orange marmalade centre

Stage 7: bling bling.

Ah, the final touches to the masterpiece. In honour of our friend Louis, we deftly decorate the Jaffa à la Vuitton. Claassic! Back into the fridge for the final ‘setting stage’ before the camera’s out and it’s paparazzi time.

An icing tube held over the chocolate-coated cake, a monogrammed handbag on the table behind

Stage 8: say cheese

More wine and our work of art faces its biggest challenge yet. The photoshoot. For those who are slightly confused about the Louis Vuitton symbols suddenly turning orange – we painted them with food colouring. And there we have it – The Triple decker Jafftastic Louis Vuitton Jaffa Cake™. Enjoy.

The finished cake ringed with yellow LV monograms, an ordinary Jaffa Cake beside it for scale

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