Very Hungry Caterpillar Cake

One day there was a very hungry small caterpillar cake called Eric. He searched and
searched the land for the finest foods and in the end he found:

1kg self raising flour
6tbsp cocoa powder
800g sugar
725g margarine
6tbsp golden syrup
1pt milk
10 eggs
1 large jar chocolate spread
1 small jar seedless jam
1 bag minstrels
8 large bars plain chocolate
1 large bar of white chocolate
1 packet chocolate fingers
icing

And this is what he did with them:

In the first hour;
He enlisted the help of two unsuspecting slaves to aid him in his quest and made four
chocolate sponge cakes using a secret family recipe using no eggs!

In the second hour;
Using the aforementioned slaves he cooked up 4 more sponges, this time plain ones after a
dispute as to whether the insides of a caterpillar are brown or cream. This time a more traditional
cake making method was used. But still, testing and licking of bowls was required.

In the third hour;
He sat back and admired the work of his slaves, eight perfect sponges.

Then he made a perfect replica of his face in white chocolate with a
hint of yellow colouring and left this to set in the fridge.

In the fourth hour;
Construction took place, this was a difficult task so a mother slave was required. The
chocolate sponges were cemented together with chocolate spread and the plain sponges with
jam, having sliced the bottom segments off each. They were then piled together with more
chocolate spread to create a leaning tower of sponges which was then lowered gently to its side.

In the fifth hour;
One slave was asked to melt the chocolate in the microwave – the said slave was then sacked for
managing to set fire to the chocolate (a difficult feat but expertly done!) Slaves were dispatched
to the local supermarket to buy more chocolate while mother slave tried to rid kitchen of
the smell of burnt chocolate. The second batch of chocolate was successfully melted – this time by
mother slave – and spread on the skin of the caterpillar with chocolate fingers added to give more definition.

In the sixth hour;
He was hoisted on to a bed of leaves, just like the original, this time created by an
artistic slave that happened to be passing by.

The finishing touches were then created – enlarged smarties made from minstrels
covered in icing, enlarged feet from coloured icing, enlarged dolly mixtures from icing, stripes
from piped melted white chocolate and the crowning glory, his face complete with enlarged wonky
eyes just like the original!

In the seventh hour;
He sat back and admired his work. He wasn’t hungry any more (and neither were the slaves
after all that bowl licking) and he wasn’t little any more. He was a big fat PIMP!

The End